At least black people knew when they were slaves; you remain clueless.

Life's temporary for a reason, it gets boring after awhile.

My first open mic, I drank a full pitcher of beer by myself. I wasn't afraid of being in front of people as much as, Is this funny?

Religious tolerance. No! Zero tolerance for any type of religion.

I think a lot of women look at prostitutes like they're scabs crossing an union picket line, where they go: You can't just go out and sell it for what it's worth, we're holding out for so much more!

Right at the end of the big wall of vibrators, $29.95, big rubber fist. Thirty bucks! Just in time for mothers day.

If you tell me you are going to kill yourself, I'm not going to try to talk you out of it.