The ultimate act of cowardice is the fat-headed wrestling guy sitting behind the frail kid in math class, clipping him on the ear, saying: 'What are you going to do about that, faggot?' That is cowardice. When the bullets start flying past that jock's saucer-shaped ears, that's not cowardice. That's payback.

Even your religious friends do not want to hear about God during a medical diagnosis.

I am a player in life, not an observer. I look at herpes the way you look at a scraped knee.

We have no healthcare and we have all the guns in the world, it makes you think twice before you start throwing punches in a bar.

You want to help mother Earth? Try sodomy. Sodomy is eco-friendly, and abortion is green.

I'm not the one-take wonder that a lot people think I am.

The only legitimate excuse you could have for having a baby in those dire, war torn, famine struck conditions - would be to eat it.