Old people always tell you: 'When you've been around as long I have, then you can argue.' As soon as they're ripped off, it's a different story.

When I say that asian women are beautiful it's not a sexual thing. I'm not being degrading, I find them sexually repulsive.

If you really believe death leads to eternal bliss then why are you wearing a seatbelt?

Don't eat a mushroom stem and see colors, eat the whole bag and see GOD

The catholic church has a lot more money than any Colombian cartel and they leave a lot more bodies in their wake.

Pot is to narcotics what herpes is to social diseases; it doesn't count cos it's not really dangerous and it's too easy to get.

If you get offended by words - by noises we make with our mouths - it means you were raised by bad parents.