Paralympics... fascinating because just watching anyone with a major disability trying to do everyday chores is fun to watch.

I used to do boiler room telemarketing for a living, like hardcore fraud stuff that gets busted on 60 Minutes every week.

Shouldn't the long-term goal of any society be complete unemployment?

A lot of the Olympic games just boil down to genetics. Michael Phelps is genetically built to swim better than other people if he trains the same way. You might as well have a competition for who's the tallest, and act like it's anyone's game!

Pot is to narcotics what herpes is to social diseases; it doesn't count cos it's not really dangerous and it's too easy to get.

When you consider the overpopulation in this world ... homosexuality is completely underrated in this society.

Everybody's angry. They've got nothing to be angry at, so they're angry about nothing.