Child pornography is the only crime that you cannot report to the police as an eyewitness.

I'm pretty drunk and bored with yelling at the stone walls that are your minds.

I am a player in life, not an observer. I look at herpes the way you look at a scraped knee.

You're born absolutely free except for laws of nature, if you drink you get drunk, that's a law, if you get old you die, that's a law too; if you sit on a tack you will bleed from the ass, these are the only laws that you're born with.

America takes credit for giving you freedom that you had anyway. It's like going to a wedding and putting your tag on somebody elses box.

There should be no such thing as a vice law. Every vice is only a bad habit, and the punishment is inherent in the act.

Did you ever drink so much of a certain type of alcohol that you get so sick that you can never drink the same kind again ? I've decided that's how I'm going to quit drinking. One-at-a-time.