Life's temporary for a reason, it gets boring after awhile.
If you get made fun of working at Pier One Imports, you can't pelt them with poop.
I've been doing a lot of drugs in the last few weeks and drinking less, and I feel much better.
I'm not saying drinking is all that great but you know it's got benefits; you can't smoke somebody pretty.
I do good things in my life, too. It's just that none of them are funny.
The first thing I think of when I wake up is how close I am to death. But then it gets better during the day.