People wrestle alligators but not once has someone done it without an audience.

I drank, smoked and did drugs to get where I'm at.

So you stick something up your ass, and you hope it might work, and it usually helps.

I've jammed enough things up my own ass just trying to come on any amphetamine based narcotic.

The Unbookables are supposed to be unbookable. That's what it's all about.

If I have to be a monotheist, y'know pick one, I'm picking vodka, it goes well with everything, all occasions.

The internet has done nothing but good for comedy all around. Comedians no longer have to rely on TV execs and club owners deciding if they are funny or not.