Doing stand-up takes the fun out of being funny.
When I say that asian women are beautiful it's not a sexual thing. I'm not being degrading, I find them sexually repulsive.
Separation of Church and State is the perineum of America and the episiotomy didn't hold.
People hate people just cause they want someone different to hate.
People wrestle alligators but not once has someone done it without an audience.
I do good things in my life, too. It's just that none of them are funny.