The characteristic of a well-bred man is, to converse with his inferiors without insolence, and with his superiors with respect and with ease.

High definition ruined a lot of things that I used to hold sacrosanct in pornography.

I immediately split the crowd. I thought about coming on every night and shouting, 'Gay pride, white power!' just to confuse people.

There's no such thing as addiction, there's only things that you enjoy doing more than life.

Comedy is like music; it builds on itself. Once someone comes up with a theory or a different way of doing things, people start to mimic it on some level. That's why you go back to the guys you loved in the 80s... and it just seems tired now, because it was all foundation.

Religious tolerance. No! Zero tolerance for any type of religion.

The ultimate act of cowardice is the fat-headed wrestling guy sitting behind the frail kid in math class, clipping him on the ear, saying: 'What are you going to do about that, faggot?' That is cowardice. When the bullets start flying past that jock's saucer-shaped ears, that's not cowardice. That's payback.