When I say that asian women are beautiful it's not a sexual thing. I'm not being degrading, I find them sexually repulsive.

Religion is by no means a proper subject of conversation in a mixed company.

Pot is to narcotics what herpes is to social diseases; it doesn't count cos it's not really dangerous and it's too easy to get.

People wrestle alligators but not once has someone done it without an audience.

My first open mic, I drank a full pitcher of beer by myself. I wasn't afraid of being in front of people as much as, Is this funny?

When I say that asian women are beautiful it's not a sexual thing. I'm not being degrading, I find them sexually repulsive.

The only legitimate excuse you could have for having a baby in those dire, war torn, famine struck conditions - would be to eat it.