If second hand smoke is killing that many people and nicotine is so addictive then why is no one addicted to second hand smoke?

I don't like being in the UK for every other reason aside from the show. It's aesthetically uncomfortable to me on almost every level for reasons that might sound petty but I can't get past. The audiences are far more challenging and while I wouldn't say I prefer it, I certainly need it to ward off my inherent laziness.

There's a fine line between being a sicko and an adventurous spirit.

Life is like a movie, if you've sat through more than half of it and it’s sucked every second so far, it probably isn't going to get great right at the end and make it all worthwhile. None should blame you for walking out early.

Complaining that a comic is drunk is like going to a titty bar and complaining because your lapdancer is a communist.

I don't have a gun. But I think they level the playing field. I accept that there's really nothing you can do about it. It's like nuclear weapons; if they exist then eventually other people are going to have them. Maybe just take away people's motivation to use them.

The first five times that you bang someone and the last million times are two different worlds.