Artists who say that they're artists: usually people who need a job.

When you consider the overpopulation in this world ... homosexuality is completely underrated in this society.

People who want to kill other people are the last people I want to party with, because I get mouthy when I drink.

Paralympics... fascinating because just watching anyone with a major disability trying to do everyday chores is fun to watch.

Charlie Chaplin said something to the effect that humor is an act of defiance, that we must laugh in the face of our helplessness in the forces of nature or go insane. And where is he now? Dead.

Love is such an arbitrary thing. I love my mom. I love pancakes.

I've never tried to drive my career in any particular direction. I've always been an in-the-moment, live-for-today guy. I've never had a goal, and nearly everything I've done has been an accident. I just play to me, and if I can amuse myself, I consider it a victory.