I believe that everyone should be treated as an individual. Women should be treated equally in the right to vote, sure. But if Im paying to see a comedy, then I just want to see whos funniest, with everyone treated equally.

What I've lost in years I've gained in wisdom. Bullshit, I haven't learnt one thing in the last 15 years that hasn't just depressed me more.

If you get offended by words - by noises we make with our mouths - it means you were raised by bad parents.

You forget, when you're in the Scandinavian countries, you forget they don't speak English first and they speak better than I do.

Religion is by no means a proper subject of conversation in a mixed company.

If you're offended by any word in any language, it's probably because your parents were unfit to raise a child.

I'm a bit of a potty mouth. My dad used to wash out my mouth with soap, but that was just to get rid of any traces of his DNA.