TV is easier: it's all planned out for you, and the audience is there to see a show and they are all pumped up, but when you are in a comedy club, you have to be really funny to win them over. To me, that's more pure.

I had no problem going into retirement mode, ... I do what other retired guys do. I putter around the house and travel.

My cranky cardiologist says I'm destined to die in the kitchen.

I actually was worried about the pounding, but I actually love running more than working out on the elliptical. Now if I get on the elliptical, I feel like I'm trapped.

When I did Comic Relief, I did it to be on the show; it's a badge of honor as a comedian to do that show.

As far as your personal goals are and what you actually want to do with your life, it should never have to do with the government. You should never depend on the government for your retirement, your financial security, for anything. If you do, you're screwed.

Green Screen was a total experiment. I'm glad we did it, but it was just tough on that network to get it going.