My cranky cardiologist says I'm destined to die in the kitchen.

I am never out there just jogging for the heck of it. I never do that. I start to run with a goal in mind, whether it's a certain time or certain distance or a specific heart-rate goal, and then I am done.

In any other job, they're truck drivers. In show-biz, they're Transportation Captains.

I remember when I took a temp job... so I got a job at a department store. Something temporary to put on my resume, my parents said. Yeah... till I die!

I always thought I was going to die before I was 60.

I used to go to the library all the time when I was kid. As a teenager, I got a book on how to write jokes at the library, and that, in turn, launched my comedy career.

The economy is in trouble, schools are in trouble, and people have been leaving the city in droves for a long, long time.