When a man has no reason to trust himself, he trusts in luck.
The man who can keep a secret may be wise, but he is not half as wise as the man with no secrets to keep.
I express many absurd opinions. But I am not the first man to do it; American freedom consists largely in talking nonsense.
The only way to amuse some people is to slip and fall on an icy pavement.
When a man diets, he eats oatmeal in addition to everything else he usually eats.
About all some men accomplish in life is to send a son to Harvard.