Where the guests at a gathering are well-acquainted, they eat 20 per cent more than they otherwise would.

In thousands of years there has been no advance in public morals, in philosophy, in religion or in politics, but the advance in business has been the greatest miracle the world has ever known.

A man should be taller, older, heavier, uglier, and hoarser than his wife.

Nothing is wonderful when you get used to it.

One trouble with growing old is that it gets progressively tougher to find a famous historical figure, who didn't amount to much when he was your age.

People never have confidence in a Big Talker. They know his statements must be cut down, but they can never tell how much.

If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers.