One trouble with growing old is that it gets progressively tougher to find a famous historical figure, who didn't amount to much when he was your age.

If the fools do not control the world, it isn't because they are not in the majority.

Never tell a secret to a bride or a groom; wait until they have been married longer.

One has fear in front of a goat, in back of a mule, and on every side of a fool

Some men are alive simply because it is against the law to kill them.

Men have as exaggerated an idea of their rights as women have of their wrongs.

Don't take up a man's time talking about the smartness of your children; he wants to talk to you about the smartness of his children.