A loafer never works except when there is a fire; then he will carry out more furniture than anybody.

Some men storm imaginary Alps all their lives, and die in the foothills cursing difficulties which do not exist.

I express many absurd opinions. But I am not the first man to do it; American freedom consists largely in talking nonsense.

Faith may have removed mountains way off somewhere, a long time ago, but it won't remove a wart at home this week.

What is common sense? That which attracts the least opposition that which brings most agreeable and worthy results.

Don't take up a man's time talking about the smartness of your children; he wants to talk to you about the smartness of his children.

Nothing is wonderful when you get used to it.