A bachelor is a guy who leans toward women - but not far enough to lose his balance.
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
A vacation is what you take when you can no longer take what you've been taking.
He's so snobbish he has an unlisted zip-code.
Saying 'Gesundheit' doesn't really help the common cold - but its about as good as anything the doctors have come up with.
This is the age of bargain hunters. If it had been this way in biblical times, we'd probably have been offered another commandment free if we had accepted the first ten.