The fastest way for a politician to become an elder statesman is to lose an election.

This is the age of bargain hunters. If it had been this way in biblical times, we'd probably have been offered another commandment free if we had accepted the first ten.

The man who didn't want his wife to work has been succeeded by the man who asks about her chances of getting a raise.

Modern man drives a mortgaged car over a bond-financed highway on credit-card gas.

An exhaustive study of police records shows that no woman has ever shot her husband while he was doing the dishes.

A bachelor is a guy who leans toward women - but not far enough to lose his balance.

He was so honest you could play craps with him over the phone.