To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain; tell a man it's deductible.
Always remember, money isn't everything - but also remember to make a lot of it before talking such fool nonsense.
He's so snobbish he has an unlisted zip-code.
Gossip is when you hear something you like about someone you don't.
Many a standing ovation has been caused by someone jumping to his feet in an effort to beat the rest of the audience to the parking lot.
Ever notice that the whisper of temptation can be heard farther than the loudest call to duty.