Somebody figured it out- we have 35 million laws trying to enforce Ten Commandments.

Many a standing ovation has been caused by someone jumping to his feet in an effort to beat the rest of the audience to the parking lot.

If you wouldn't write it and sign it, don't say it.

A bachelor is a guy who leans toward women - but not far enough to lose his balance.

Feminists say 60 percent of the country's wealth is in the hands of women. They're letting men hold the other 40 percent because their handbags are full.

You may not be able to read a doctor's handwriting and prescription, but you'll notice his bills are neatly typewritten.

Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.