To sell something, tell a woman it's a bargain; tell a man it's deductible.
Isn't it a shame that future generations can't be here to see all the wonderful things we're doing with their money?
Middle Age - later than you think and sooner than you expect.
A bachelor is a guy who leans toward women - but not far enough to lose his balance.
Saying 'Gesundheit' doesn't really help the common cold - but its about as good as anything the doctors have come up with.
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.