If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

Ever notice that the whisper of temptation can be heard farther than the loudest call to duty.

Somebody figured it out- we have 35 million laws trying to enforce Ten Commandments.

Many a standing ovation has been caused by someone jumping to his feet in an effort to beat the rest of the audience to the parking lot.

Snow and adolescence are the only problems that disappear if you ignore them long enough.

There's only one kind of tax that would please everybody - one that nobody but the other guy has to pay.

Science may never come up with a better office communication system than the coffee break.