Religion and philosophy, philosophy and religion - they're two words which are both ... different. In spelling.

I try to just talk about human stories and what I think about religion or teapots or whatever.

I am two lesbians in a man's body.

I appreciate your applause, but I don't do it for applause. I do it for cash, it's much better.

If you're choking in a restaurant you can just say the magic words, 'Heimlich maneuver,' and all will be well. Trouble is, it's difficult to say 'Heimlich maneuver' when you're choking to death.

Little red cookbook! Little red cookbook!

For me to put a look together, if it's going to be a boy look or a girl look or whatever, is quite a tricky thing to do. I'm not doing drag because drag is seen in a certain way and my comedy has got zero to do with what I'm wearing. I could wear an elephant suit and say the same thing.