I'd be happy to be taken as a woman - and that's what I was initially trying to do when I started throwing on dresses and stuff. But that wasn't going to happen because everyone kept calling me sir. So I thought I'd change the method and just start wearing what I wanted to wear.

You say 'erbs, and we say Herbs because there's a f*****g H in it!

When I watched Braveheart I was in tears and I was rooting for the Scottish people

I want to be a taxidermist! I wanna fill animals with sand. I wanna get more sand into an animal than anybody has ever bloody got in one. I wanna fill a rat with the entire Gobi Desert, so it’s really quite tight.

But the Dutch speak four languages and smoke marijuana!

Animals in the wild are lean, and I think we should be too.

What was the first cat that talked a human into putting a cat door in?