People say I've had brushes with the law. That's not true! I've had brushes with overzealous prosecutors!
I will be a model prisoner, as I have been a model citizen
Some politicians like to kiss babies. I like to kiss the baby's mommas.
The only place where David Duke and I are alike is we are both wizards under the sheets.
Up with skirts, down with pants!'
I never speak ill of dead people or live judges.