I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me.

I know what men want. Men want to be really, really close to someone who will leave them alone.

I love my parents and they're wonderful people, but they were strict, and I still look for ways to get even. When I got my own apartment for the very first time and they came to stay with me for the weekend, I made them stay in separate bedrooms.

A study last year showed that the page you turn to first in the newspaper can be a predictor of how long you will live. No surprise, turning first to the Comics Pages prolongs your life.

I am thankful the most important key in history was invented. It's not the key to your house, your car, your boat, your safety deposit box, your bike lock or your private community. It's the key to order, sanity, and peace of mind. The key is 'Delete.'

Every time we help an animal, we are healing ourselves, over and over.

I run everywhere and eavesdrop. It's the best way to see a city.