I think my ex-girlfriend has weekly lessons with the devil on how to be more evil. I don't know what she charges him.
Recently, I've ventured into the mammal family - so that's good for my sex life.
When I was a kid, I slept on rubber sheets, but now, I'm a man. And I can take the wetness!
Countries are making nuclear weapons like there is no tomorrow.
I'll do anything for my wife, it's turning out.
I was walking down the street the other day and these construction workers were working on the roof hammering away. One of them told me I was a paranoid lunatic... in morse code.