England is better only because I stand out there as 'unusual'.

Santa Fe is fun to visit, but property there will cost you an arm and a dillo.

I used to get drunk every night until I puked. Finally I admitted, "I am a bulemic".

I was feeling a bit down, I went to a therapist a few times, at a hundred bucks a pop. But then I realized that no therapy session would ever cheer me up half as much as if I was just strolling along and found a hundred dollar bill.

My dad always said, If someone hands you a lemon, make lemonade. Plus that also works wonderfully as a metaphor.

Anger punishes the bearer's heart. Who remains angry suffers most. For many, the search for perfection virtually guarantees it will be found, and disregarded in order to continue the search. Some mornings it just doesn't seem worth it to gnaw through the leather straps.

I asked my girlfriend, 'Will you marry me?' She said, 'We'll have to ask my father.' So we had a seance and Jack Ruby says, 'Hello!'