Remember, you can lead a fifty-seven-year-old body to motherhood, but you can't make it stay awake.

Let me put it this way. According to my girth, I should be a ninety-foot redwood.

Car designers are just going to have to come up with an automobile that outlasts the payments.

the ultimate in longevity is the Christmas fruitcake. It is a cake made during the holidays with fruits that make it heavier than the stove it is cooked in.

I hated skiing or any other sport where there was an ambulance waiting at the bottom of the hill.

Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen Three. It takes one to say What light and two more to say I didn't turn it on.

My son did not show signs of a money deficiency until he opened his small fist in the nursery and found it was empty.