If I had my life to live over again, I would have waxed less and listened more. ... I would have cried and laughed less while watching television ... and more while watching real life. ... But mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute of it ... look at it and really see it ... try it on ... live it ... exhaust it ... and never give the minute back until there was nothing left of it.

Never loan your car to anyone to whom you've given birth.

What does it profit a 78-year-old woman to sit around the pool in a bikini if she cannot feed herself?

I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: 'Checkout Time is 18 years.'

Motherhood is the second oldest profession in the world. It never questions age, height, religious preference, health, political affiliation, citizenship, morality, ethnic background, marital status, economic level, convenience, or previous experience.

It was a bitter moment for us. We weren't two mature parents. We were just two kids playing grown-up. We still needed Mommy and Daddy's permission, blessings, and money to survive.

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.