Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.
Good kids are like sunsets. We take them for granted.
One son appears in stereo - a transistor in one ear and the phone in the other.
The grass is always greener over the septic tank.
Sometimes I can't figure designers out. It's as if they flunked human anatomy.
If anyone knew where they were, I'd send the ISDBB (Incredibly Stupid and Dumb Beyond Belief) award to the two guys who tried to break in to the Ohio penitentiary.