As a graduate of the Zsa Zsa Gabor School of Creative mathematics, I honestly do not know how old I am.

If Life is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits?

Written on her tombstone: "I told you I was sick.

Kids are without a doubt the most suspicious diners in the world. They will eat mud (raw or baked) rocks, paste, crayons, ball-point pens, moving goldfish, cigarette butts, and cat food. Try to coax a little beef stew into their mouths and they look at you like a puppy when you stand over him with the Sunday paper rolled up.

Not everyone is comfortable with the kissing ritual. My husband is one of them. Her refuses to press lips with anyone except his wife, mother, and dog. If someone wanted to give him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, he would refuse until he had been formally introduced.

To my way of thinking, the American family started to decline when parents began to communicate with their children.

Laughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.