The woman who says, 'My kids are all speaking to one another and they love us' is a psychopathic liar.

Most mothers entering the labor market outside the home are naive. They stagger home each evening, holding mail in their teeth, the cleaning over their arm, a lamb chop defrosting under each armpit, balancing two gallons of frozen milk between their knees, and expect one of the kids to get the door.

Housework is a treadmill from futility to oblivion with stop-offs at tedium and counter productivity.

. . . but mostly, given another shot at life, I would seize every minute - look at it and really see it - live it - and never give it back.

Success is outliving your failures

Why take pride in cooking, when they don't take pride in eating?

She's as funny as a toothache