Never accept a drink from a urologist.

Success is outliving your failures

I have always felt cookbooks were fiction and the most beautiful words in the English language were 'room service.

I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes.

Crocodiles have a smile I've seen on the face of every lawyer I've ever met.

Shopping is a woman thing. It's a contact sport like football. Women enjoy the scrimmage, the noisy crowds, the danger of being trampled to death, and the ecstasy of the purchase.

My type of humor is almost pure identification. A housewife reads my column and says, 'But that's happened to ME! I know just what she's talking about!