Myths that need clarification: "Everyone in California lives on a white, sandy beach." False. The only people who live on California beaches are vacationers from Arizona, Utah, and Nevada who own condos.

I have paid as much as $300 a night to throw up into a sink shaped like a seashell.

I used everything you gave me.

Youngsters of the age of two and three are endowed with extraordinary strength. They can lift a dog twice their own weight and dump him into the bathtub.

... it's simply wrong to always order [kids] to stop that fighting. There are times when one child is simply defending his rights and damned well should be fighting.

not all bears have their own television series. Some of them are unemployed wild animals.

Giving birth is little more than a set of muscular contractions granting passage of a child. Then the mother is born.