A grandparent is the only baby-sitter who doesn't charge more after midnight - or anything before midnight.

I got so much food spit back in my face when my kids were small, I put windshield wipers on my glasses.

Women are never what they seem to be. There is the woman you see and there is the woman who is hidden. Buy the gift for the woman who is hidden.

Volunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation's compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain love for one another.

We even switched to a newly-formed church across the town that gave one hundred and twenty trading stamps each time we attended. (We now worship a brown and white chicken with a sunburst on its chest.)

Motherhood isn't just a series of contractions; it's a state of mind. From the moment we know life is inside us, we feel a responsibility to protect and defend that human being.

Mother's words of wisdom: Answer me! Don't talk with food in your mouth!