One meal a day is enough for a lion and would be for all of us if all we did all day was swat flies.

I firmly believe kids don't want your understanding. They want your trust, your compassion, your blinding love and your car keys, but you try to understand them and you're in big trouble.

Babies should enjoy the freedom to vocalize whether it be in church, a public meeting place, during a movie, or after hours when the lights are out. They have not yet learned that joy and laughter have to last a lifetime and must be conserved.

I'm on a diet as my skin doesn't fit me anymore.

Family life got better and we got our car back - as soon as we put 'I love Mom' on the license plate.

What does it profit a 78-year-old woman to sit around the pool in a bikini if she cannot feed herself?

the ultimate in longevity is the Christmas fruitcake. It is a cake made during the holidays with fruits that make it heavier than the stove it is cooked in.