Cats invented self-esteem.
I convinced him his luggage had gone to that big Bermuda Triangle in the sky.
A friend doesn't go on a diet because you are fat.
If you can't make it better, you can laugh at it.
One thing they never tell you about child raising is that for the rest of your life, at the drop of a hat, you are expected to know your child's name and how old he or she is.
Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial.