You show me a boy who brings a snake home to his mother and I'll show you an orphan.

It is my theory you can't get rid of fat. All you can do is move it around, like furniture.

Many people are intimidated by doctors. ... People also feel stupid when they don't understand what a doctor's talking about the first time around, so they don't ask again. And let's be honest here, people. English is not a doctor's first language.

Good kids are like sunsets. We take them for granted.

I have paid as much as $300 a night to throw up into a sink shaped like a seashell.

All of a sudden, I feel very old and very tired. Maybe when I get to California, the smog, brush fires, floods, and earthquakes will cheer me up.

He who laughs.....lasts.