Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It's too controversial.

The grass is always greener over the septic tank.

In the South Pacific, because of their size, mosquitoes are required to file flight plans.

No self-respecting mother would run out of intimidations on the eve of a major holiday.

With boys, you always know where you stand. Right in the path of a hurricane.

You become about as exciting as your food blender. The kids come in, look you in the eye, and ask if anybody's home.

The mole rat is the only rodent born without a fur coat. With a good lawyer, someone would pay for that little oversight.