I have just come up with a wonderful solution to end all wars. Let me give directions on how to get there.

If I had my life to live over I would have burned the pink candle sculpted like a rose before it melted in storage.

For some of us, watching a miniseries that lasts longer than most marriages is not easy.

Some of the best fiction writers got their start writing airline menus.

What's with you men? Would hair stop growing on your chest if you asked directions somewhere?

A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. "What shall we name the other one?" I smiled. She was not amused.

Humorists can never start to take themselves seriously. It's literary suicide.