I convinced him his luggage had gone to that big Bermuda Triangle in the sky.
I do not participate in any sport with ambulances at the bottom of the hill.
I don't know why no one ever thought to paste a label on the toilet-tissue spindle giving 1-2-3 directions for replacing the tissue on it. Then everyone in the house would know what Mama knows.
Mother's words of wisdom: Answer me! Don't talk with food in your mouth!
Cleanliness is not next to godliness. It isn't even in the same neighborhood.
Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.