There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say, 'Yes, I've got dreams, of course I've got dreams.' Then they put the box away and bring it out once in awhile to look in it, and yep, they're still there. These are great dreams, but they never even get out of the box. It takes an uncommon amount of guts to put your dreams on the line, to hold them up and say, 'How good or how bad am I?' That's where courage comes in.

I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: 'Checkout Time is 18 years.'

Who in their infinite wisdom decreed that Little League uniforms be white? Certainly not a mother.

If compliments were food, I'd have starved to death 28 years ago.

No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed.

Never order food in excess of your body weight.

Cleaning the house while the children are home is like shoveling while it's still snowing.