When a child is locked in the bathroom with water running and he says he's doing nothing but the dog is barking, call 911.
Erma BombeckHave you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen Three. It takes one to say What light and two more to say I didn't turn it on.
Erma BombeckJust think of all those women on the Titanic who said, 'No thank you' to desert that night. And for what?!
Erma BombeckI will never understand children. I never pretended to. I meet mothers all the time who make resolutions to themselves. 'I'm going to ... go out of my way to show them I am interested in them and what they do. I am going to understand my children.' These women end up making rag rugs, using blunt scissors.
Erma Bombeck