The mole rat is the only rodent born without a fur coat. With a good lawyer, someone would pay for that little oversight.

There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.

I come from a family where gravy is considered a beverage.

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.

I'm real ambivalent about [working mothers]. Those of use who have been in the women's movement for a long time know that we've talked a good game of "go out and fulfill your dreams" and "be everything you were meant to be." But by the same token, we want daughters-in-law who are going to stay home and raise our grandchildren.

Never accept a drink from a urologist.