With boys, you always know where you stand. Right in the path of a hurricane.

There is nothing more miserable in the world than to arrive in paradise and look like your passport photo.

There is only one thing harder in this world than forgiving. It's to ask forgiveness armed only with, 'I'm sorry'.

Most women put off entertaining until the kids are grown.

A small waist makes you tire easily.

I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: 'Checkout Time is 18 years.'

We even switched to a newly-formed church across the town that gave one hundred and twenty trading stamps each time we attended. (We now worship a brown and white chicken with a sunburst on its chest.)