No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because there is wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick.

It is my theory you can't get rid of fat. All you can do is move it around, like furniture.

There is nothing more miserable in the world than to arrive in paradise and look like your passport photo.

I'm going to stop punishing my children by saying, “Never mind! I'll do it myself.

I'm so bored. I went to the food locker yesterday to visit my meat.

One never realizes how different a husband and wife can be until they begin to pack for a trip.

If I had my life to live over, instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I'd have cherished ever moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.