There's something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she's only measured water in it.

For years, my husband and I have advocated separate vacations. But the kids keep finding us.

When humor goes, there goes civilization.

Phone are wonderful instruments, but I wouldn't want our daughter to marry one.

Every puppy should have a boy.

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth.

Someday, when my children are old enough to understand the logic that motivates a mother, I'll tell them: I loved you enough to bug you about where you were going, with whom and what time you would get home. ... I loved you enough to be silent and let you discover your friend was a creep. I loved you enough to make you return a Milky Way with a bite out of it to a drugstore and confess, 'I stole this.' ... But most of all I loved you enough to say no when you hated me for it. That was the hardest part of all.